Daily Humor

I can honestly say I was not expecting this:

<img src="https://i.imgur.com/zQXF0Kr.gif" width="50%" height="50%">
 


The Bro-Code runs deep with this man:

8DyZ8Qn.png
 

I ran some errands this morning. I drove by 3 lovely ladies wearing shorts and halter tops.

After the third trip by them, one chick yelled, "Enough!!! Go home!"
 



I tried to hustle a chick in Stevens Point, WI. I knew I struck out when she asked me, "What's a guy like you doing in a nice place like this?"
 

One of our own.........

......NSFW!!!!!


 


<img src="http://s3-ec.buzzfed.com/static/2014-11/25/19/enhanced/webdr04/enhanced-32556-1416963130-1.jpg" />
 



Grampa and grandma were watching a televangelist.

Televangelist told them, "Come touch the tv with one hand and touch want you want healed with the other hand."

Grampa put one hand on the tv and the other hand on his crotch.

Gramma yelled at him, "He didn't ask you to raise the dead!!!"
 

<iframe width="700" height="394" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/2tvpaD4oatk" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

.
 

DH, I was going to congratulate you for being the first jackwad to pollute the first 4 page thread in the history of the OT board that didn't devolve into partisan political garbage, but that was actually pretty funny. "Climate disruption." I like it!
 

Whew, I didn't play it myself, but I trust Elmer from the Minnesotans For Global Warming website. He said it was funny.
 



I've been a big fan of Elmer my entire life. Sniffed a ton of his glue.
 




I was reading an article last night about fathers
and sons, and memories came flooding back
of the time I took my son out for his first drink.

Off we went to our local bar, which is only
two blocks from the house.

I got him a Guinness Stout. He didn't like it –
so I drank it.

Then I got him an Old Style, he didn't like
it either, so I drank it.

It was the same with the Coors and the Bud.

By the time we got down to the Irish whiskey . . .
I could hardly push the stroller back home.
 









A monk scribe in a monastery pauses before he pens the next letter and the head monk notices the frown on his face. "Are you going to continue copying Holy Scripture, my son?"

The scribe looked at his master and said, "No, Master. We are copying from copies. If we made a mistake, we would carry that mistake into our new copies."

The Master stopped all the scribes work and took one of the copies down to the crypt where the oldest Scripture had been stored. All the scribes waited for a very long time for his return. Finally, the monk who originally stopped got up to go to the crypt. There he found his Master and asked, "What is wrong? Why haven't you returned."

The master, sobbing, looked up from the scripture he had been checking all these hours and said, "It says 'celebrate'."
 

:clap:
A monk scribe in a monastery pauses before he pens the next letter and the head monk notices the frown on his face. "Are you going to continue copying Holy Scripture, my son?"

The scribe looked at his master and said, "No, Master. We are copying from copies. If we made a mistake, we would carry that mistake into our new copies."

The Master stopped all the scribes work and took one of the copies down to the crypt where the oldest Scripture had been stored. All the scribes waited for a very long time for his return. Finally, the monk who originally stopped got up to go to the crypt. There he found his Master and asked, "What is wrong? Why haven't you returned."

The master, sobbing, looked up from the scripture he had been checking all these hours and said, "It says 'celebrate'."

Like. :clap::clap:
 

98 year old man at Doctor's office for annual physical:

Doctor: "You are in pretty good shape, Herb. Any concerns?"

Herb: "Just wondering when I go pee, the light comes on. When I finish, the light goes off. Is it a message from God?"

Doctor talks to Herb's wife.

Her explanation: "Oh no! He's the one pissing in the refridgerator!!!"
 

Gramma: "I think you should try that Viagra stuff."

Grampa: "But those things are spendy. $10 a pill."

Gramma: "you mean you can't afford $20 a year?"
 




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