First of all, when the boys are bitching about things inside the organization it doesn’t mean the organization is unhealthy—It means the boys give a *&^!#*&^!#*&^!#*&^!# about what’s going on. To do it over the internet and TV is_____ fill in the blank. I mean, the boy must have a huge pair to march into the coach’s and AD office to tell them……oh wait……he posted online. The only smoke I see in all of this is the injuries on this team. Someone needs to dig in and see if there’s a dumpster fire going on somewhere.
Second, when the boys stop bitching inside the organization it is a giant red flag—means they don’t care or have given up. By the way, it’s really easy to see this.
Third, kids will make mistakes. I make mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes. That’s how you learn the tough lessons in life. But there are consequences to your actions/decisions—welcome to the real world!
Fourth, break them down and build them up. Not sure what that means. Eliminate the word “I”, or “me” and replace it with “us” or “team” is a good starting point. Some kids will never get this, see above. Do you allow them to remain with you or do you put them on the road? As a leader, should you be fair and consistent? As a leader should you give up on kids right away?
Fifth, pop the titty out of their mouths. As leader, especially with type A’s, the boys will always be bucking around trying to see what they can get away with. Leave a grey area and they will find it. They can and will run you right over if you allow it. Push hard and have incredibly high goals and expectations. Mental toughness is everything. Don’t leave things up for “interpretation”. Spell out exactly what is expected along with any consequences if they are needed. They know the consequences so it’s on them not you.
Lastly, I raised my voice 2 times in the Marine Corps and yelled at or berated my boys in front of others. To this day, I regret those 2 times, I lost my cool, and I took the easy route. As the top leader in the organization, it has no place. You want the boys to keep their emotions in check during the game and not get called for stupid penalties, or make stupid “mental” mistakes? Out in the bars Saturday night getting into fights because emotions cannot be controlled. Then lead from the front and set the example.
It’s lonely at the top. You don’t really have any friends in the organization. It’s easy to be a leader, but it’s damn hard to be a good one.
