Getting Something That’s 5 lbs?

[zman]

I think it's Norwood's Mega Tongue

 

[matt]

A draft version of AJ Barker’s manifesto.

 

[Replacement Gopher]

A bronzed mega tongue?

 

[Replacement Gopher]

Glen Mason’s phone?

 

[Replacement Gopher]

Richard Pitinos unused U of MN stationary?
Jerry Kill’s bricks?
Mary Jo Kane’s womens rowing team boat house blue prints?

 

[highwayman]

Bits of a broken chair.

 

[BTChamp]

 

[matt]

Glen Mason’s phone?

Will you answer if it rings?

 

[Replacement Gopher]

Will you answer if it rings?

yes, but it stopped ringing after the Chris Perry Michigan game.

 

[MNVCGUY]

2 pages of awesome guesses already and the OP said the package isn't coming till sometime next week.

My guess is that it's Mike Sanford's playbook. Most of the weight is the binder because the passing section is non-existent.

 

[pregameatblarneys]

Sparty’s severed head

What's in the box?!?!?

 

[short ornery norwegian]

if it was 9 pounds, it could be a 9-pound hammer.

Courtesy of John Prine:

This nine pound hammer
Is a little too heavy
Buddy for my size
Buddy for my size

So I'm going on the mountain
Just to see my baby
And I ain't coming back
No I ain't coming back

 

[Gophers7NatTitlesBadgers0]

2 pages of awesome guesses already and the OP said the package isn't coming till sometime next week.

My guess is that it's Mike Sanford's playbook. Most of the weight is the binder because the passing section is non-existent.

I thought Sanford's playbook consisted of:

1st down - RUTM
2nd down - RUTM
3rd down - Deep long developing pass route

Even with the binder, it shouldn't be anywhere near 5 lbs. you'd think!

 

[MNVCGUY]

I thought Sanford's playbook consisted of:

1st down - RUTM
2nd down - RUTM
3rd down - Deep long developing pass route

Even with the binder, it shouldn't be anywhere near 5 lbs. you'd think!

Maybe it was a really heavy duty binder with lots of blank pages in it to give the impression that he knew what he was doing.

 

[Yah-E]

Package not even picked up yet by UPS! Shipping label was generated yesterday.

 

[Word]

Package not even picked up yet by UPS! Shipping label was generated yesterday.

Delivery service and tracking info by UPS and Fedex have been awful in the last year. I've had some just flat out wrong tracking info (like saying a package had been delivered when it hadn't), not to mention things just taking days longer than it would have a couple years ago.

 

[mngolf]

Leftovers from Bert's lunch?

 

[Drake University Gopher]

I've always wanted to make a dash to grab one of those things...

That was my job when I did the nets. Needless to say I was successful in defending our pylon’s honor!

 

[cheeseheadgophfan]

A pair of game-worn Tracy Claeys boxer shorts?

 

[GopherTheJugular]

Best. Thread. Ever. some genius guesses here.

I wouldn't go that far. That one thread from like 10 years ago when people were speculating over Shaka Smart coming here and whatnot, that was a doozy!

 

[GopherTheJugular]

I bought it. It’s signed by PJ. It’s in my sons room

Did you get that from the Gopher online auction thing that gets posted on here every now and then? I think I remember seeing that as an option. I bid on, and won, a team chair from Williams arena, like the chairs the players sit on. Pretty neat to have in my place.

 

[GopherTheJugular]

Jerry Kill’s bricks?

I was gonna say, prior to how things are run now, in the past it would have made TOTAL sense for the U to give donors some items from the previous coaching regime. But, after playing "Jump Around" after beating WI, we have an awesome dept. now.

 

[GopherTheJugular]

As for my guess, I'll go with the shovel Jerry Kill finally returned to the athletic department now that he's done digging himself into a hole.

 

[MonikerSchmoniker45]

An oar signed by the team would be pretty sweet.

 

[Yah-E]

An oar signed by the team would be pretty sweet.

Dude…this would be epic! But I doubt it

 

[matt]

Package not even picked up yet by UPS! Shipping label was generated yesterday.

This should be illegal! I hate it when you get the email that says the item has shipped but really they just printed the label.

 

[Yah-E]

 

[stemar]

The chip that used to reside on Jerry Kill's shoulder?

 

[nitramnaed]

I think it's like a Wizard of Oz thing where they just pull something out of the closet or bag or whatever and send it off. I'm sure 5lbs of awesome is on the way.

 

[gopherdudepart2]

Scott Frost book of deep thoughts. "I wonder what color of underwear the cheerleaders are currently wearing, maybe no undies"?