Sir Tipsy McStagger
Legend & Gopherhole Watchdog
- Joined
- Sep 28, 2010
- Messages
- 551
- Reaction score
- 0
- Points
- 16
Gentleman,
At this historic hour, we Golden Gopher faithful pledge ourselves to the principles of Fall Saturdays, of Tailgating, and of all things Maroon and Gold. No Hawkeye, nor Badger can destroy ideas which are eternal and indestructible. Sacred too are the principles of discourse which emphatically declare that no body of this digital age can quiet the roar of the people when their voices call out in unison. No moderator wielding his sword of censorship can turn back the people when they hunger for a new direction. My fellow Gopher Faithful, we have spent these past years suffering an unjust persecution by a powerful few. From this persecution too, we UNITED Maroon and Gold Brothers can draw new strength. We send greetings to the persecuted and oppressed. We greet our old friends in the Gopherhole . Their steadfastness and loyalty deserve admiration. The courage with which they maintain their convictions and their unbroken confidence in we, the banned, guarantee a brighter future.
While we have been absent from this virtual village of brothers, we have not stopped living, we have not stopped believing in our Alma Mater, and we have not stopped tailgating. We continue to tailgate better than anyone else. Our style dazzles the west endzone each and every day the Gophers take the field at TCF. Those that have the pleasure of tailgating with us count themselves amongst that luckiest of Gopher fans.
We have spent these years in isolation, pondering with great care what accommodations must be made before we grace this fine community with the wit, wisdom, recruiting insight, polls of pumped-ness, tales of our travels, and once again entertain one and all. After much soul searching, Mr. Kelly Leeks, Dr. Lloyd Christmas, and I, Sir Tipsy McStagger, have unanimously concluded that the time is right for our triumphant return. The people have spoken and the pleas have not fallen on a deaf ear.
To begin the dialog, I must first say to the moderators of this board, apology accepted. It was very gracious of you. I speak for Mr. Leeks and Dr. Christmas when I say the maroon and gold bouquet that we each received was a very nice gesture. However, prior to our return to the community on a probationary level, we need the following changes to be made to the Gopherhole as it currently operates.
People of the Gopherhole, we, your People's champion, have heard your calls. Together we can bring a new direction to this board, to this great society of the faithful, and to Golden Gopher football. Make your voices heard, for we are on the doorstep of a a new tomorrow! We'll kick down that door and be greeted by a Golden ray of light this Saturday and all of our yesterdays will be forgotten!
Go Gophers!!!!
At this historic hour, we Golden Gopher faithful pledge ourselves to the principles of Fall Saturdays, of Tailgating, and of all things Maroon and Gold. No Hawkeye, nor Badger can destroy ideas which are eternal and indestructible. Sacred too are the principles of discourse which emphatically declare that no body of this digital age can quiet the roar of the people when their voices call out in unison. No moderator wielding his sword of censorship can turn back the people when they hunger for a new direction. My fellow Gopher Faithful, we have spent these past years suffering an unjust persecution by a powerful few. From this persecution too, we UNITED Maroon and Gold Brothers can draw new strength. We send greetings to the persecuted and oppressed. We greet our old friends in the Gopherhole . Their steadfastness and loyalty deserve admiration. The courage with which they maintain their convictions and their unbroken confidence in we, the banned, guarantee a brighter future.
While we have been absent from this virtual village of brothers, we have not stopped living, we have not stopped believing in our Alma Mater, and we have not stopped tailgating. We continue to tailgate better than anyone else. Our style dazzles the west endzone each and every day the Gophers take the field at TCF. Those that have the pleasure of tailgating with us count themselves amongst that luckiest of Gopher fans.
We have spent these years in isolation, pondering with great care what accommodations must be made before we grace this fine community with the wit, wisdom, recruiting insight, polls of pumped-ness, tales of our travels, and once again entertain one and all. After much soul searching, Mr. Kelly Leeks, Dr. Lloyd Christmas, and I, Sir Tipsy McStagger, have unanimously concluded that the time is right for our triumphant return. The people have spoken and the pleas have not fallen on a deaf ear.
To begin the dialog, I must first say to the moderators of this board, apology accepted. It was very gracious of you. I speak for Mr. Leeks and Dr. Christmas when I say the maroon and gold bouquet that we each received was a very nice gesture. However, prior to our return to the community on a probationary level, we need the following changes to be made to the Gopherhole as it currently operates.
- The "how hot is your chili" polls each week MUST stop. Only then will the Pumped Poll return.
- Kelly Leeks must be the initial inductee in the Gopherhole Hall of Fame.
- The moderators must formally recognize that Kelly Leeks is the only poster in the history of message boards to be banned for not posting.
- Also, Chris Monter the recruiting guy must report to Kyle Kesell
- Gopherhole has to host the Kelly Leeks Podcast
- All threads started by one of us must be thumbtacked for 48 hours.
- The current Lloyd Christmas must be banned or forced to change his name and apologize for defaming the true and honorable Lloyd Christmas.
People of the Gopherhole, we, your People's champion, have heard your calls. Together we can bring a new direction to this board, to this great society of the faithful, and to Golden Gopher football. Make your voices heard, for we are on the doorstep of a a new tomorrow! We'll kick down that door and be greeted by a Golden ray of light this Saturday and all of our yesterdays will be forgotten!
Go Gophers!!!!
