This one's for you Zales!
An ODE on a Slide Trombone:
(AKA: the badger's slippery slope)
The CHAIR: some in Lincoln would say "why should we care?" we sit down and have a drink.
The Bell: we still have it here, "what the hell?" we won it from Penn State.
A chair that won't hold you and a bell you can't ring, another round the waiter brings.
Hold the glasses high...here's to you... and we have to ask the others: "Do you hate Iowa too?"
Now tell me of the glory and the traditions that you know
the JUG that Yost left here...the PIG, the stolen bacon: the badger was the crook...
The AXE became the trophy for the winner of the game to take
And when the Gopher wins the game the AXE stays in our great state.
The walk in the wilderness will only end for sure when all the trophys come to rest
the CHAIR...the BELL..the JUG...the PIG and finally our favorite, the AXE.
TCF BANK STADIUM will echo SKI-U-MAH and illuminated by the Northern Star
ourfootball fans and the marching band shall praise the Gopher near and far.
Just one single old Slide Trombone Man recalls that step and beat...
He marched in that old dome so long but never forgot his home was on the Range.
Zales was a troubadour marching in the band: the pride of Minnesota, trombone in hand.
And sometimes I recall RANGER Zales when I hear the ROUSER played...
The CHAIR? Yes Zales we need the CHAIR that you remember all so well
I think I'll call it broken bits of wood, but only if you don't think you'd care.
And maybe if we think of it, you can ring that Freedom Bell...
The trophys come and go but if the GOPHER wins the AXE everyone feels so well!
And the broken bits of CHAIR...bring those broken bits along!
Old Zales marches slowly...he still knows the sharps and flats...he knows all the songs.
He can even play Sousa's Minnesota March backwards from memory and by heart.
Zales: always was a "first chair" guy, but in Alumni Band he'll play most any part.