I didn't realise until reading this thread that Coach Fleck had lost a child... My wife and I lost our amazing 21 year old daughter just over four months ago and I can promise that everyday is hard in every possible way. It is hard to see a positive future or feel your life has purpose, hard to find any joy in the world and hard to be responsive to the emotions of those around us as we all deal with tragedy in different ways at different times (even though the sense of loss doesn't seem to diminish).
I'm not sure if all GopherHolers are aware of this but I just searched this article explaining where the row the boat mantra comes from apologies if it is just me that didn't know).
https://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/ncaa...oach-p-j-fleck-tells-emotional-181358296.html
My experience is that it is inevitable that a person changes after losing a child. The fact that Coach Fleck has devoted himself to a mantra/culture that accentuates community, serving, giving and compassion I find inspiring. I don't find it surprising that it requires incredible self-belief, self-affirmation and unwavering devotion to sustain this either as it is so easy to retreat into nothingness, given the circumstances, if doubt creeps in.
I like and respect Coach Kill (but feel these comments show lack of understanding); I like Coach Claeys (and felt sorry that he became a scapegoat IMHO at the time of his departure) and I believe 100% that Coach Fleck is genuinely a great man and a great role model/football coach.
As a side note, there has only been two occasions since what happened that I have felt a surge of positive emotions - once when we captured the axe and again when we won the bowl game.