Brewster's Koaching Kwiz

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Hey kids, you think you know more than Coach Brewster about football? Match wits with him on the quiz below:

1.You're behind with less than one minute left and the clock running. You should call
a)a pass play
b)a run play up the middle. The defense will never expect it!
c)a draw play. You saw it work on TV once.

2.Your team's offensive strategy should be:
a)Power running
b)Pro-set passing attack
c)spread offense
d)All of the above

3.Your one blue chip recruit is a backup QB and the starting QB is struggling. You should
a)bench the starter and put in the backup to see what he can do
b)draw up a couple of trick plays for the backup to come in 4 times a game
c)Move the backup to wide receiver until he gets hurt

4.Its fourth down and 7 late in the game and you're behind. You should
a)Run a draw play
b)throw it 5 yards downfield at the receiver's feet
c)hail Mary
d)start thinking about what you'll say at the postgame presser
e)suck up to Sid after the game so he writes another column saying you should keep your job another year.

5.Your placekicker is shaky beyond 30 yards, and his chances of hitting something 40 or longer are about the same as hitting the powerball jackpot. How close do you need to get to hit a game winning field goal?
a)30 yard line
b)anything beyond extra point distance is a crapshoot
c)Figuring out yard line + 10 + 7 is way too hard to do while standing

6.Which attributes are most important in a defensive football player?
a)being able to be in the right position
b)speed
c)knowing how to tackle
d)how to hold his liquor
e)any two of the above is OK

7.When those pesky reporters are criticizing you in the postgame presser after a loss, what's the best response?
a)assert with utter conviction that the team is getting better
b)"hey, if it weren't for those 2 or 3 touchdowns where nobody touched the runner, we'd be undefeated"
c)blame it on the previous coach

8.Offensive coordinators are:
a)interchangeable
b)an internship position
c)a job where no previous experience is required
d)sort of like the battery in your smoke detectors. You should get a new one every year

9.How many timeouts should you save for the end of the game?
a)Save em? Huh?
b)Its more fun to burn them in the 3rd quarter
c)Time outs? I don't need no steenkin' timeouts.

10.You've started out 1-4 in your 4th season. You should
a)Buckle down. You can still go 6-1 in the BT
b)Start painting the house neutral colors and cleaning out closets to make them look bigger.
b)Hit up Mike Shanahan's facebook page at least once/day. He might need a TE coach in Washington next year.
 

Pretty long post. Must have taken you some time to write it.
 

A clever way to make some valid points. Oh, for the day when we won't have to do this sort of thing (because we have a smart winning coach).
 

1.You're behind with less than one minute left and the clock running. You should call
a)a pass play
b)a run play up the middle. The defense will never expect it!
c)a draw play. You saw it work on TV once.

If it works, it's the right choice. If it doesn't work, no matter which of these three you chose, people will say you should have done one of the other two.


3.Your one blue chip recruit is a backup QB and the starting QB is struggling. You should
a)bench the starter and put in the backup to see what he can do
b)draw up a couple of trick plays for the backup to come in 4 times a game
c)Move the backup to wide receiver until he gets hurt

Must be a hypothetical, because Weber isn't struggling.

4.Its fourth down and 7 late in the game and you're behind. You should
a)Run a draw play
b)throw it 5 yards downfield at the receiver's feet
c)hail Mary
d)start thinking about what you'll say at the postgame presser
e)suck up to Sid after the game so he writes another column saying you should keep your job another year.

Again, the draw play is the right call if it works. If it works, you look like a genius. As for throwing at someone's feet, here's a secret for you - quarterbacks sometimes miss their targets.


5.Your placekicker is shaky beyond 30 yards, and his chances of hitting something 40 or longer are about the same as hitting the powerball jackpot. How close do you need to get to hit a game winning field goal?
a)30 yard line
b)anything beyond extra point distance is a crapshoot
c)Figuring out yard line + 10 + 7 is way too hard to do while standing

Nonsense question. If you get the ball to the 30 yard line, you're close enough to try a FG. Obviously, you want to get the ball as close as possible, even in the NFL they don't consider the 30 "good enough".

6.Which attributes are most important in a defensive football player?
a)being able to be in the right position
b)speed
c)knowing how to tackle
d)how to hold his liquor
e)any two of the above is OK

If you're the QB, it's obviously tackling, because apparently, when the defense can't tackle, it's Weber's fault.

[
 

See, now this is funny. Not like that piss-poor excuse for comedy posted by the Vadger.
 



What Rodent Rampage said... +1
 

Pretty long post. Must have taken you some time to write it.

Not really, mostly spaces and lines. Wordcountwise, its probably shorter than a lot of the theses people post. Besides, I'm home recovering from hernia surgery, so it was a choice between dorking off on this board and tackling the list of suggestions my wife left me with.
 

Not really, mostly spaces and lines. Wordcountwise, its probably shorter than a lot of the theses people post. Besides, I'm home recovering from hernia surgery, so it was a choice between dorking off on this board and tackling the list of suggestions my wife left me with.

Good luck with the recovery. I know all about hernia surgery.
 






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