Tom Powers: Gophers simply competing against their previous performance

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BleedGopher

BleedGopher

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per Powers:

The Golden Gophers football team will be dining out this weekend, traveling all the way to Las Cruces, N.M., for its weekly nonconference cream puff.

This marks the only time in nonconference play the Gophers will venture off campus. They won't travel again until Oct. 5, when the Big Ten will insist they make an appearance in Ann Arbor. So this game against New Mexico State is important in that it will provide valuable experience. The younger student-athletes will learn how to check into a hotel, adjust a thermostat and request a wakeup call.

These are real life lessons. Hey, some of those TV remotes can be tricky. Push the "pay per view" button by mistake, and NCAA enforcement minions will be waiting at the airport. And the pop machines in the hall often will spit out incorrect change, potentially ripping off unsuspecting youngsters who aren't quite sure about where to complain.

Again, it's not a matter of "if" they will devour this cream puff. It's about how they go about it. The ideal scenario has them taking care of business a bit more efficiently than the week before. Oh, and also learning how to work the elevator buttons in a hotel.

http://www.twincities.com/gophers/c...phers-simply-competing-against-their-previous

Go Gophers!!
 

The last time I was with a team on an elevator, we had one unknown character on board. Just as the elevator started stopping, he said.."Do you notice how no one talks on an elevator?" some said "Ya." He said, "Well I fart", he did, elevator stopped, we got out laughing, and the incoming people had to smell it as the elevator doors closed.
 



Dr.Don said:
The last time I was with a team on an elevator, we had one unknown character on board. Just as the elevator started stopping, he said.."Do you notice how no one talks on an elevator?" some said "Ya." He said, "Well I fart", he did, elevator stopped, we got out laughing, and the incoming people had to smell it as the elevator doors closed.
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That never gets old.
 


Week 1: Only B10 road game - Northwestern at Cal
Week 2: Only B10 road game - MN at New Mexico
Week 3: Only B10 road games - Iowa at ISU; Wisconsin at Arizona State
Week 4: Only B10 road games - Michigan at Connecticut; Michigan State at Notre Dame

Where is the snark for the 6 B10 teams that don't even leave home before the B10 season? Where is the snark for Michigan going to Connecticut?

"Cynicism is what passes for insight among the mediocre." Joe Klein. Tom Powers is among the mediocre (at best) press in the Twin Cities. And the line is looooooong.
 


Dr.Don said:
Well, do you ever fart in an elevator?
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I try not to. But I love farting on planes. You really can't fart loudly enough for anyone to hear it. I just wallow in my own effervescence.
 




"This cream puff"

Great Plains Gopher said:
"This cream puff" outplayed the Gophers in TCF two years ago.
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Ditto. It's amazing to me how cavalierly Powers and many others are taking NMS given they beat us up 2 years ago, and given we are still of unknown quality. We still have alot to prove. I'll take any kind of win this Saturday.
 

Unregistered User said:
Week 1: Only B10 road game - Northwestern at Cal
Week 2: Only B10 road game - MN at New Mexico
Week 3: Only B10 road games - Iowa at ISU; Wisconsin at Arizona State
Week 4: Only B10 road games - Michigan at Connecticut; Michigan State at Notre Dame

Where is the snark for the 6 B10 teams that don't even leave home before the B10 season? Where is the snark for Michigan going to Connecticut?

"Cynicism is what passes for insight among the mediocre." Joe Klein. Tom Powers is among the mediocre (at best) press in the Twin Cities. And the line is looooooong.
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Yeah, and why does he make checking into a hotel a quarter of the article? Does he have nothing notable to say? He is free to write whatever he wants, but the article is pretty pointless and it is clear he is trying to belittle us, and for what purpose? If he is upset about UNC (and I am and agree), write that. That at least has some relevance. Nice work, Powers... more investigative genius. Next week, we cement our ability to strap on a helmet.
 

Air-headed jokes aside about college students operating elevators, this is the classic 'no-win situation' the Gophers seem to face every year. All these 'writers' like to have it both ways - Minnesota is purportedly a lousy team (or as Powers suggests better than last year but still not 'good enough'), and will be lucky to get 4-5 wins. But then everyone we play is a 'cream puff'. Maybe we are lousy again. Maybe not. You play the schedule put in front of you (usually laid out several years prior) and try to assess where you stand relative the 110+ other teams around the country. The 'winning equation' for these hacks is as follows:

1) Lay out a non-conf schedule with 4 BCS conference teams, preferably all powerhouses - since I'm sure Vanderbilt et al wouldn't qualify as a quality opponent. Write about how Gophers have a tough road and this is their chance to show progress.

2) Go 0-4 or even 1-3 going into conference play. Write critical and faux analytical columns questioning the head coach and his staff's ability to lead this program where it needs to be. Be sure to state that coach can 'turn things around with a strong performance in conference' (knowing this is even a tougher road)

3) Go sub-.500 in Big Ten play. Write column about how coach can't recruit the good enough players for this conference, his system isn't competitive, etc. If team surprises and plays well in conference (say 4-4), say it's because of the tough non-conf schedule.

4) Rinse and repeat for another 2-3 years, call for coaches head, and start process all over again with pre-written articles from previous regime. Continue collecting paychecks for writing the same thing year in and out, just replacing the names and avoiding any real research.

Apparently when you are a powerhouse team and you schedule the UMass and Nichols States of the world, these guys don't bat an eye. Recall that when the Gophers scheduled a home-and-home with USC, some still complained ***coughSouhancough*** that we had NMSU and NDSU on our schedule. And I love that Powers can't resist the UNC-payout jab here (without mention of replacing that game down the line with a much tougher opponent in TCU). Selective distribution of the facts. Gotta love it.
 

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