Safety Steve Montgomery has U #1

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this would be quite the get if we can get him to sign the dotted line on signing day! hopefully jerry goes in for the kill on this one!
 


Let's get all of the requisite bashing out of the way, shall we?

1. Many of his BCS offers are from Big East and ACC schools. They shouldn't be allowed to call what they play "football". Each player and coach associated with a Big East and ACC school should be drug out into the street and summarily executed. Or, at least, they should be made to play women's rugby at the club level.

2. His only offer from a real football school is from Wisconsin. And it's not even a real offer - it's only for a greyshirt. Besides, they cooled on him.

3. He's a thug.

4. Why are we recruiting a kid from Florida? Surely there are plenty of MN kids that are worthy of holding 7 BCS offers - they just don't get enough coverage and exposure by the national recruiting services. Plus, they would practice and play harder than out-of-state kids because they are from Minnesota.

5. None of his offers are real. Not even Minnesota's. None of us were in the room when they happened, so how can we be sure?

6. Not only are none of his offers real, but all 4 of his official visits coming up in the next 3 weeks are all actually unofficial. Those schools are in cahoots with Steven by going along with his plan to make them look official, but in reality he and his family are paying for the visits themselves. It's all part of a grand conspiracy to dupe Minnesota into offering a functionally illiterate kid who has 2 reconstructed knees and a heart condition. If Minnesota manages to see through this clever ruse, and does not sign him to a scholarship, Montgomery will walk on at Tarleton St.

7. Did I mention he's a thug?

8. Even if he does manage to convince Minnesota to sign him, his career here will end unceremoniously when he's convicted of a DUI on a motorcycle while running a red light and speeding, as he's on the cell phone with his designated test-taker, cleaning out his bong, swinging a 2 x 4 at passers-by, and muttering something about Rose Bowls and saying "Jiminy Christmas". All of this will be happening simultaneously.

Did I miss any of the stock responses to anything positive? Please feel free (and encouraged) to add to the list per your wont.
 

I think you covered all of 'em, Dpo.
I look forward to seeing Montgomery sign in Feb!
 


dpodoll68 said:
Let's get all of the requisite bashing out of the way, shall we?

1. Many of his BCS offers are from Big East and ACC schools. They shouldn't be allowed to call what they play "football". Each player and coach associated with a Big East and ACC school should be drug out into the street and summarily executed. Or, at least, they should be made to play women's rugby at the club level.

2. His only offer from a real football school is from Wisconsin. And it's not even a real offer - it's only for a greyshirt. Besides, they cooled on him.

3. He's a thug.

4. Why are we recruiting a kid from Florida? Surely there are plenty of MN kids that are worthy of holding 7 BCS offers - they just don't get enough coverage and exposure by the national recruiting services. Plus, they would practice and play harder than out-of-state kids because they are from Minnesota.

5. None of his offers are real. Not even Minnesota's. None of us were in the room when they happened, so how can we be sure?

6. Not only are none of his offers real, but all 4 of his official visits coming up in the next 3 weeks are all actually unofficial. Those schools are in cahoots with Steven by going along with his plan to make them look official, but in reality he and his family are paying for the visits themselves. It's all part of a grand conspiracy to dupe Minnesota into offering a functionally illiterate kid who has 2 reconstructed knees and a heart condition. If Minnesota manages to see through this clever ruse, and does not sign him to a scholarship, Montgomery will walk on at Tarleton St.

7. Did I mention he's a thug?

8. Even if he does manage to convince Minnesota to sign him, his career here will end unceremoniously when he's convicted of a DUI on a motorcycle while running a red light and speeding, as he's on the cell phone with his designated test-taker, cleaning out his bong, swinging a 2 x 4 at passers-by, and muttering something about Rose Bowls and saying "Jiminy Christmas". All of this will be happening simultaneously.

Did I miss any of the stock responses to anything positive? Please feel free (and encouraged) to add to the list per your wont.
Click to expand...


He doesn't run the 40 under 4.4, i'll pass.
 

dpodoll68 said:
Let's get all of the requisite bashing out of the way, shall we?

1. Many of his BCS offers are from Big East and ACC schools. They shouldn't be allowed to call what they play "football". Each player and coach associated with a Big East and ACC school should be drug out into the street and summarily executed. Or, at least, they should be made to play women's rugby at the club level.

2. His only offer from a real football school is from Wisconsin. And it's not even a real offer - it's only for a greyshirt. Besides, they cooled on him.

3. He's a thug.

4. Why are we recruiting a kid from Florida? Surely there are plenty of MN kids that are worthy of holding 7 BCS offers - they just don't get enough coverage and exposure by the national recruiting services. Plus, they would practice and play harder than out-of-state kids because they are from Minnesota.

5. None of his offers are real. Not even Minnesota's. None of us were in the room when they happened, so how can we be sure?

6. Not only are none of his offers real, but all 4 of his official visits coming up in the next 3 weeks are all actually unofficial. Those schools are in cahoots with Steven by going along with his plan to make them look official, but in reality he and his family are paying for the visits themselves. It's all part of a grand conspiracy to dupe Minnesota into offering a functionally illiterate kid who has 2 reconstructed knees and a heart condition. If Minnesota manages to see through this clever ruse, and does not sign him to a scholarship, Montgomery will walk on at Tarleton St.

7. Did I mention he's a thug?

8. Even if he does manage to convince Minnesota to sign him, his career here will end unceremoniously when he's convicted of a DUI on a motorcycle while running a red light and speeding, as he's on the cell phone with his designated test-taker, cleaning out his bong, swinging a 2 x 4 at passers-by, and muttering something about Rose Bowls and saying "Jiminy Christmas". All of this will be happening simultaneously.

Did I miss any of the stock responses to anything positive? Please feel free (and encouraged) to add to the list per your wont.
Click to expand...

We don't need talent. Coach Kill can take a JV high school team into the Big Ten after he "coaches them up."
 

Gary Patterson was going to offer him and turn him into a game changing right tackle
 




GopherFan75 said:
You can turn anyone into a superstar as long as you coach them up.
Click to expand...

Anyone?

steven-hawking.jpg
 


dpodoll68 said:
Let's get all of the requisite bashing out of the way, shall we?

1. Many of his BCS offers are from Big East and ACC schools. They shouldn't be allowed to call what they play "football". Each player and coach associated with a Big East and ACC school should be drug out into the street and summarily executed. Or, at least, they should be made to play women's rugby at the club level.

2. His only offer from a real football school is from Wisconsin. And it's not even a real offer - it's only for a greyshirt. Besides, they cooled on him.

3. He's a thug.

4. Why are we recruiting a kid from Florida? Surely there are plenty of MN kids that are worthy of holding 7 BCS offers - they just don't get enough coverage and exposure by the national recruiting services. Plus, they would practice and play harder than out-of-state kids because they are from Minnesota.

5. None of his offers are real. Not even Minnesota's. None of us were in the room when they happened, so how can we be sure?

6. Not only are none of his offers real, but all 4 of his official visits coming up in the next 3 weeks are all actually unofficial. Those schools are in cahoots with Steven by going along with his plan to make them look official, but in reality he and his family are paying for the visits themselves. It's all part of a grand conspiracy to dupe Minnesota into offering a functionally illiterate kid who has 2 reconstructed knees and a heart condition. If Minnesota manages to see through this clever ruse, and does not sign him to a scholarship, Montgomery will walk on at Tarleton St.

7. Did I mention he's a thug?

8. Even if he does manage to convince Minnesota to sign him, his career here will end unceremoniously when he's convicted of a DUI on a motorcycle while running a red light and speeding, as he's on the cell phone with his designated test-taker, cleaning out his bong, swinging a 2 x 4 at passers-by, and muttering something about Rose Bowls and saying "Jiminy Christmas". All of this will be happening simultaneously.

Did I miss any of the stock responses to anything positive? Please feel free (and encouraged) to add to the list per your wont.
Click to expand...

He looks slow and stiff on film.
 






GopherFan75 said:
Lol, that's what I've been told. Eric Decker and Marion Barber were "coached up" to become superstars, why not him?
Click to expand...

Decker and Barber were not coached up. The low ratings on those 2 has to do with their speed and competition factors more than any thing. Those two were just very instinctive football players, something ratings don't judge.
 


dpodoll68 said:
Let's get all of the requisite bashing out of the way, shall we?

1. Many of his BCS offers are from Big East and ACC schools. They shouldn't be allowed to call what they play "football". Each player and coach associated with a Big East and ACC school should be drug out into the street and summarily executed. Or, at least, they should be made to play women's rugby at the club level.

2. His only offer from a real football school is from Wisconsin. And it's not even a real offer - it's only for a greyshirt. Besides, they cooled on him.

3. He's a thug.

4. Why are we recruiting a kid from Florida? Surely there are plenty of MN kids that are worthy of holding 7 BCS offers - they just don't get enough coverage and exposure by the national recruiting services. Plus, they would practice and play harder than out-of-state kids because they are from Minnesota.

5. None of his offers are real. Not even Minnesota's. None of us were in the room when they happened, so how can we be sure?

6. Not only are none of his offers real, but all 4 of his official visits coming up in the next 3 weeks are all actually unofficial. Those schools are in cahoots with Steven by going along with his plan to make them look official, but in reality he and his family are paying for the visits themselves. It's all part of a grand conspiracy to dupe Minnesota into offering a functionally illiterate kid who has 2 reconstructed knees and a heart condition. If Minnesota manages to see through this clever ruse, and does not sign him to a scholarship, Montgomery will walk on at Tarleton St.

7. Did I mention he's a thug?

8. Even if he does manage to convince Minnesota to sign him, his career here will end unceremoniously when he's convicted of a DUI on a motorcycle while running a red light and speeding, as he's on the cell phone with his designated test-taker, cleaning out his bong, swinging a 2 x 4 at passers-by, and muttering something about Rose Bowls and saying "Jiminy Christmas". All of this will be happening simultaneously.

Did I miss any of the stock responses to anything positive? Please feel free (and encouraged) to add to the list per your wont.
Click to expand...

In case Mr. Montgomery or his family scroll through here. This post was dripping with sarcasm;)
 

Montgomery would be a nice get. I see where Thomas Hammock is the coach who's been recruiting him, and I'm very glad that Coach Kill decided to keep Hammock on staff, as I would consider Hammock to be a top-notch recruiter, and that can only help us wiith guys he's been after ala Montgomery and Sankey.
 

lol Dpo!! Great stuff!

As far as Montgomery goes, play4theU!!
 


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