RodentRampage
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December 15, 2010, 10:37 AM, Minneapolis Minnesota.
Roof collapses at TCF Bank Stadium.
"This collapse of our roof has exposed our stadium to over 19,000 pounds of air pressure per square yard," stated University of Minnesota Athletic director Joel Maturi. [1] "It also leaves the field exposed to electromagnetic radiation, most notably in a range between 390 and 750 nanometers," continued Mr. Maturi. [2] "Our physics department has indicated that looking directly at this radiation source can be dangeroud for extended periods of time. People whose bodies have been exposed to this radiation source have often experienced symptoms such as a darkening of the skin." [3]
In addition, sources in the Chemistry department have noted that the roof collapse has left TCF Bank Stadium exposed to Dihydrogen Monoxide (DHMO) [4], both in its crystalline and molten form. Dihydrogen monoxide:
is called "hydroxyl acid", the substance is the major component of acid rain.
contributes to the "greenhouse effect".
may cause severe burns.
is fatal if inhaled.
contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.
has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.
Despite the danger, dihydrogen monoxide is often used:
as an industrial solvent and coolant.
in nuclear power plants.
in the production of Styrofoam.
as a fire retardant.
in many forms of cruel animal research.
in the distribution of pesticides. Even after washing, produce remains contaminated by this chemical.
as an additive in certain "junk-foods" and other food products.
[1]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atmospheric_pressure
[2]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Visible_spectrum
[3]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sun_tanning
[4]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DHMO
Roof collapses at TCF Bank Stadium.
"This collapse of our roof has exposed our stadium to over 19,000 pounds of air pressure per square yard," stated University of Minnesota Athletic director Joel Maturi. [1] "It also leaves the field exposed to electromagnetic radiation, most notably in a range between 390 and 750 nanometers," continued Mr. Maturi. [2] "Our physics department has indicated that looking directly at this radiation source can be dangeroud for extended periods of time. People whose bodies have been exposed to this radiation source have often experienced symptoms such as a darkening of the skin." [3]
In addition, sources in the Chemistry department have noted that the roof collapse has left TCF Bank Stadium exposed to Dihydrogen Monoxide (DHMO) [4], both in its crystalline and molten form. Dihydrogen monoxide:
is called "hydroxyl acid", the substance is the major component of acid rain.
contributes to the "greenhouse effect".
may cause severe burns.
is fatal if inhaled.
contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.
has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.
Despite the danger, dihydrogen monoxide is often used:
as an industrial solvent and coolant.
in nuclear power plants.
in the production of Styrofoam.
as a fire retardant.
in many forms of cruel animal research.
in the distribution of pesticides. Even after washing, produce remains contaminated by this chemical.
as an additive in certain "junk-foods" and other food products.
[1]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Atmospheric_pressure
[2]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Visible_spectrum
[3]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sun_tanning
[4]http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/DHMO
