Hatsofftothee
Member
- Joined
- Oct 11, 2009
- Messages
- 41
- Reaction score
- 2
- Points
- 8
Fantasy, or Prophecy????
The season is changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost, for none now live who remember it. It began with the old national championships where they voted even before the bowl games were played. Six (some would say seven) were given to the Gophers, immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings. . . . But they were all of them deceived, for another axe was made. In the land of Wisconsin, in the Fires of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Barry Alvarez forged in secret a master axe to control all others, and into this axe he poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. One axe to rule them all. One by one, the free lands of Minnesota fell to the power of the Axe, but there were some who resisted. A last alliance of Gophers marched against the armies of Wisconsin, and on the very slopes of Mount Dome, they fought for the freedom of Minnesota. Victory was near, but the power of the axe could not be undone (because some idiots couldn’t even run a simple punt play for Pete’s sake!!!). . . . . And some things that should not have been forgotten were lost. History became legend, legend became myth. And for ten really long years, the axe passed out of all knowledge. Until, when chance came, it ensnared a new bearer. The Axe came to the creature Bielema, who took it deep into the tunnels of Camp Randall. And there it consumed him. The axe brought to Bielema unnatural long life (but a surprisingly short tenure as head coach). For five years it poisoned his mind, and in the gloom of Bielema’s cave, it waited. Darkness crept back into the forests of the world. Rumor grew of a shadow in the East, whispers of a nameless fear, and the Axe of Power perceived its time had now come. It abandoned Bielema. But something happened then that the Axe did not intend. It was picked up by the most unlikely creature imaginable: a Gopher, Jerry Kill, of Dinkytown. For the time will soon come when Gophers will shape the fortunes of all.
The season is changed. I feel it in the water. I feel it in the earth. I smell it in the air. Much that once was is lost, for none now live who remember it. It began with the old national championships where they voted even before the bowl games were played. Six (some would say seven) were given to the Gophers, immortal, wisest and fairest of all beings. . . . But they were all of them deceived, for another axe was made. In the land of Wisconsin, in the Fires of Mount Doom, the Dark Lord Barry Alvarez forged in secret a master axe to control all others, and into this axe he poured his cruelty, his malice and his will to dominate all life. One axe to rule them all. One by one, the free lands of Minnesota fell to the power of the Axe, but there were some who resisted. A last alliance of Gophers marched against the armies of Wisconsin, and on the very slopes of Mount Dome, they fought for the freedom of Minnesota. Victory was near, but the power of the axe could not be undone (because some idiots couldn’t even run a simple punt play for Pete’s sake!!!). . . . . And some things that should not have been forgotten were lost. History became legend, legend became myth. And for ten really long years, the axe passed out of all knowledge. Until, when chance came, it ensnared a new bearer. The Axe came to the creature Bielema, who took it deep into the tunnels of Camp Randall. And there it consumed him. The axe brought to Bielema unnatural long life (but a surprisingly short tenure as head coach). For five years it poisoned his mind, and in the gloom of Bielema’s cave, it waited. Darkness crept back into the forests of the world. Rumor grew of a shadow in the East, whispers of a nameless fear, and the Axe of Power perceived its time had now come. It abandoned Bielema. But something happened then that the Axe did not intend. It was picked up by the most unlikely creature imaginable: a Gopher, Jerry Kill, of Dinkytown. For the time will soon come when Gophers will shape the fortunes of all.
